Star Trek IM: Where No Man Has Gone Before
by Serena Kenobi
Summary: Welcome to the Enterprise chatroom. You have been warned.


**Star Trek IM: Where No Man Has Gone Before**

By **Serena**

_Welcome to the Enterprise chatroom. You have been warned._

_**WARNING**: This story contains randomness, OOCness, and insanity.  
_

_**A/N: **Man, I've got like fifteen fics to update... AAAAHHH!!! But the plot bunnies are killing me. This however, can be either a series or oneshots. It doesn't matter either way. If you'd like to know who is who, then let me know and I'll tell you in the next chapter. :) _

**_Disclaimer_**: _Me no own. You no sue. _

_

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__ENTERPRISE Chatroom 1

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_

**Coolest_Captain_Ever has logged in. **

**NOTanElf has logged in. **

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: ** Let me guess… Spock?

**NOTanElf: **Very astute observation, Captain.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **How is it that you can still manage to sound completely sarcastic without you even speaking??

**NOTanElf: **I'm sure I have no idea.

**DocsRuletheWorld has logged in. **

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Hm – this is a toughie. :p

**DocsRuletheWorld: ** If you don't know who I am then either my screen name isn't obvious enough, or you're just an idiot.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **I was kidding, geez, Bones. Of course I know who you are.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **How was I supposed to know you were kidding? I'm a doctor, not a mind-reader. I leave that to the hobgoblin.

**NOTanElf: **Perhaps I should change my name to include that as well…

**LOVEtheEars has logged in. **

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Oh, my, my. :D This must be our lovely Uhura. Or every other woman on this blasted ship who goes for Spock. (scowls)

**LOVEtheEars: **It's me.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **That doesn't help.

**LOVEtheEars: **Let me put this in a way that someone with a feeble mind such as urself can understand. THIS IS UHURA.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **lol

**NOTanElf: **^_-

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **OK, that's just freaky, Spock. You still manage to raise one eyebrow on THE COMPUTER.

**LOVEtheEars: **It's an art. :D

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **But seriously. All the girls on this ship are crazy for the Vulcan. The guy who DOESN'T SHOW HIS EMOTIONS. Geez, what is this, a freako universe?

**LOVEtheEars: **Or just a bunch of very smart women. :D Who, of course, need to stay far, far away from my man.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **You mean Vulcan.

**NOTanElf: **I am still half-human, Doctor.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Yeah, yeah, whatever.

**NOTanElf: **Has it occurred to anyone that most of the senior officers are on a chatroom instead of on duty? Most of us should be at work.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **You first.

**LOVEtheEars: **It's fine. I'm sure the others can handle it.

**RailThin has logged in. **

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Honestly, I got no clue who this is. Any ideas, people?

**LOVEtheEars: **That weird guy w/ the accent.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Which one?

**RailThin: **'Ey! I resent that.

**LOVEtheEars: **Er… is it that strange, ugly little creature who keeps staring at me?

**RailThin: **What???!

**DocsRuletheWorld: **No, I think it's Spock in disguise.

**NOTanElf: **^_-

**RailThin: **NO! It's me! Scotty!

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Who?

**RailThin: **Your transporter guy?

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Erm…. Sorry, ain't ringing any bells.

**LOVEtheEars: **I still think it's that small, ugly creature.

**RailThin: **NO!!! It's ME!!

**DocsRuletheWorld: **OK, so maybe it's not Spock, because he doesn't use those thingy-majjigers… er, whaddaya call 'em…

**LOVEtheEars: **Exclamation points?

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Know it all.

**LOVEtheEars: **Hypochondriac.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Show-off.

**LOVEtheEars: **Grumpy-grump.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Fancy-pants.

**LOVEtheEars: **Grouchy-grouch.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Irritating person.

**LOVEtheEars: **Nice comeback, genius. XP

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Hey!! I'm a doctor, not a genius.

**LOVEtheEars: **U can say that again.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **I take it back. I am a genius.

**LOVEtheEars: **No ur not. Ur a doctor.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Hey, that's not true! I'm a doctor, not a doc… er…

**NOTanElf: **^_-

**LOVEtheEars: **HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **LOL!

**LOVEtheEars: **Gotcha there, _genius. _

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **LOL!! That was PRICELESS!! BURN!!!

**NOTanElf: **That was impressive, Lieutenant.

**LOVEtheEars: **(fans herself) Thxs, honey-buns. ;D

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Shut up, you hobgoblin!!!

**LOVEtheEars: **Wait, I'M a hobgoblin now??!

**NOTanElf: **Well, we are seeing each other. Perhaps he's decided to extend the courtesy to you as well.

**LOVEtheEars: **Oh. Wutever. Stupid doctors…

**NOTanElf: **However, if you call her that again, Doctor, you leave me no choice but to render you unconscious.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **I meant YOU, not HER! IDIOTS!!!

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Geez, take a chill pill.

**RailThin: **I don't quite get what's goin' on…

**LOVEtheEars: **Hey, Mystery Man! Wut's up?

**RailThin: **I'm not a bloody Mystery Man! I'm Scotty, for the love of Pete!

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Nah, Scotty would have a name like TransporterMan or EnergizerScotty or something like that. RailThin doesn't make any sense.

**RailThin: **It will!! ARGH!

**NOTanElf: **I must leave. I have an appointment I can't miss.

**LOVEtheEars: **:D I wonder wut THAT could be? (grins) Perhaps maybe a date with a gorgeous not to mention genius lady? :D

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Isn't that… against the rules?

**LOVEtheEars: **Yep.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **As Captain, I could stop you.

**LOVEtheEars: **Nope.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Um… because you'd kill me if I tried, right?

**LOVEtheEars: **Yep.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Oh.

**NOTanElf: **Spock out.

**NOTanElf has logged out. **

**LOVEtheEars: **And that's my cue!! By all! Bye Mystery Man!

**RailThin: **OH FOR THE LOVE OF –

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Stupid women and their stupid ability to win all the stupid arguments.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Oh, take it like a man, Bones.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **I'm a doctor, not a m… SCRATCH THAT!!!!

**LOVEtheEars: **HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!! OH MAN!!! You set yourself up for that one, Bonesy.

**DocsRuletheWorld: **Forget this.

**DocsRuletheWorld has logged out. **

**LOVEtheEars: **Well, I gots to go. Adieu!

**LOVEtheEars has logged out. **

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Great, now I'm the only one on here.

**RailThin: **Um, HELLOOOOOO?????

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **You don't count.

**RailThin: **WUT??!!?!?!?!?!?!

**FromRussiaWithLove has logged in. **

**FromRussiaWithLove: **Hello. Theese ees Chekov.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever: **Oh geez.

**Coolest_Captain_Ever has logged out.**

**FromRussiaWithLove: **Hello?

**RailThin: **Hey, there, mate. I'm Scotty.

**FromRussiaWithLove: **Who?

**RailThin: **Oh, THAT'S IT!!!

**RailThin has logged out. **

**FromRussiaWithLove: **… What?

* * *

_OK, it was random. Hey, it's me. You have to know right off the bat - I write random stuff. Don't ask me why.  
_

_- **Serena**_


End file.
